Report on the 70th Annual General Meeting

A bigly number of 41 Club members, plus the Chairman of Scarborough Round Table, Dave Robinson, and Simon’s guest Paul Ratcliffe, assembled in the convivial surroundings of Scarborough Yacht Club, on the Vincent Pier, on 16 April 2026.

The pre-prandial pleasantries were perfunctorily perforated by the Secretary going around members asking, imploring, beseeching and bribing someone to take the AGM minutes for him. Apparently, a dog had eaten his pen. Or something.

Chairman Richard struggled to drag members away from the bar and it took several ad hoc symphonies on the Club xylophone (all the right notes, just not in the right order) to get everyone away from the Wold Top pump and up to the table.

The minutes of the previous Annual General Meeting and the Annual General Tapas, both of which no one could (or wanted to) remember, were approved, nem con. For the same reason, there were no matters arising.

The Secretary gave his report in which he promised – again – that this would be his last year in the role. He summed up the Secretarial year, and was followed by the Treasurer, whose full report was delayed until May due to the slowness of converting the Club funds back from Japanese Yen to Sterling. Once again, he reported, a successful year of non-apologies had led to a good selection of wine on the table for the AGM dinner. Important financial matters such as that over, the Catering Officer, in absentia, submitted a written report read by his assistant deputy sub-Catering Officer, and the main man was congratulated on a varied and interesting programme. The Membership Officer reported on 44 members of the Club with one inductee promised at the next (May) meeting in the shape of his fellow indoor curling companion (don’t ask), Paul Ratcliffe. The last remaining Newsletter/Web team member standing began droning on, but was rescued by the late arrival of the Sports Officer who launched into his report on the spot. The Club’s sporting prowess and natural muscularity was on show throughout the year at a series of enjoyable events.

The Chairman followed with his report and emphasised the highlight of his year, celebrating the Club’s 70th Anniversary, and congratulating Simon and his organising committee. Mercifully, neither told any jokes.

The Club was so exhausted by having to remember things as far back as last month that a welcome break had to be made for dinner.

Richard Frank was “volunteered” to read grace and made a fine stab at it (all the right words, just not in the right order) and we all gratefully sat back down to get stuck into the free wine and a hearty pie and peas supper, etc etc.

Things were thus getting somewhat hazy by the time the meal had finished and the incoming Chairman, Simon “Third Time Lucky” Lockley, was presented with his Chain of Office by the outgoing Chairman, Richard. Past Chairman’s jewel duly presented, Simon congratulated Richard on a successful year and introduced his proposed committee who were elected en bloc, nem con.

There followed an intense discussion which seemed to be about whether dancing in the aisles was allowed at the SJT. However, the purport of this argument and the intensity of the debate and oratory were lost on your correspondent who was forced to move from Merlot to Shiraz due to a bottle being purloined under his very nose by the Wilko end of the table.

The new Vice Chairman, Stephen Slade, declined to say anything but gave a sure promise that his year would be much more exciting than the one coming up.

You are referred to the forthcoming minutes of the AGM, recorded by an upright and sober Club member, for more veracity and less vagarity on any of the above.

Our next meeting would be on 21 May at Gianni’s.

RTBI concluded a very pleasant evening of good humour and banter accompanied by good food and wine, and members and guests gradually staggered off into the night trying to avoid falling into the harbour.

Captain Pugwash
Yacht Club correspondent